Psychological Confessions: TODDLERHOOD

            At about two to four years old, I was already engaging in different developmental tasks described by Erikson as the following: a.) elaboration of locomotion – as evidenced by the fact that I can already walk, run and play; b.) fantasy play – as evidenced by my being able to play with my toys be it a doll, a stuffed toy or a mini bike; c.) language development – I remember my parents telling me that I can’t seem to pronounce one of my Aunt’s name “Aunt Mary Jane” which led to my calling her Jeh instead, which eventually became her nickname. Until now, all of us, including my brother and sister, call her Jeh; d.) self control – little by little, I learned to defecate using the toilet rather than some place else. But I vividly remember that it was hard for me. There were times when I would just remove my bowels in my room or on the kitchen floor. I was such a messy kid.  But I don’t recall any violent reaction from my parents. Either they were too lax or I have repressed the possibility that there were some violent reactions from them. I believe that repression is the stronger possibility in this instance. This is because I have an anal retentive attitude that can explain my OC tendencies / obsessive-compulsive nature. As such, I can’t study when I see a single dirt in my room, I can’t leave for school unless my room is thoroughly clean and made up; I always give in to my urge of cleaning which eats up a lot of my study time; I always wash my hands when I have touched something which I perceive to be  dirty even when it’s really not; I keep on checking my wallet and keys all the time; I keep on checking my skin for blemishes, whiteheads and pimples; etc.
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